Breaking the Chain
by SleepovrMassacre
Summary: Shane is afraid of telling Carmen how she really feels. After a heart-felt talk in the kitchen, will Shane finally have the guts to be honest?


This is my ending to a scene from season 2's episode "Late, Later, Latent". I own none of these amazing characters and especially the bit of script I'm opening up with.

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Carmen: I know how hard you work to keep yourself at a distance from everyone else on the planet, but it's not working for you anymore.

Shane: It's working fine.

Carmen: No, it's not. It's not, because of this.

[Carmen puts Shane's hand to her own heart, and then puts her hand on Shane's heart.]

Carmen: Okay? Do you feel this? Most people don't have this. This is rare.

Shane: So what?

Carmen: That's right. So what? So what, if nothing ever comes out of this? So what, if you'll never act on it? You are so convinced that having a relationship near you is going to kill you.

Shane: Because it will.

Carmen: And that's why I'm with Jenny. It works because she and I are both biding our time, waiting for the real deal to come along.

Shane: Yeah. You don't think you and Jenny are the real deal?

Carmen: No.

Carmen: Jenny wouldn't know what the real deal was if it bit her in the ass. She is so... lost in her own darkness. I think she likes it in there.

Carmen: But do you know what's fucked up?

Carmen: Is that you and I know what the real deal is. We saw it the first time we laid eyes on each other.

Carmen: You're not living your life, Shane. And if you don't take any risks...then you might as well be dead.

Shane stared at Carmen for what seemed like ages, but in reality it was a mere second. _Wow, she is _so_ beautiful, _she thought. _I wonder if she knows just how amazing she is. _She wanted to kiss her. To take Carmen into her arms and never let her go. She was inches away; one small reach and she could pull Carmen in and tell her all the things she was afraid of. How she was terrified of loving anyone, let alone this girl who came into her life and changed it forever. _Stop being a pussy. Just grab her hands and tell her. Cup her angelic face with your undeserving hands and kiss her. Put every feeling and emotion you can muster into this one kiss to prove to her how much she means to you..._

Before Shane could do anything, Carmen turned and started walking out of the kitchen. She dropped her gaze to the floor and Shane swore she heard a sniffle. _She's crying. Your selfishness and cowardice is making her cry! DO SOMETHING!_ It took all she had but she pushed herself off from the counter and reached out to grab Carmen's arm. "Don't go...please." For a second Shane thought she only said the words in her head because Carmen didn't react. No words, no sounds, nothing. _It was too little to late. You fucked it up. Yet another thing you fucked up in your life. _

"Why not? Give me a reason to stay Shane," Carmen choked out in between tears. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't walk out the door and give up on you," Carmen added still facing thr doorway.

"I don't know. I...I...don't know what you want me to say."

Carmen's heart dropped. She knew it. She knew it would be hard to break the wall around Shane's heart as soon as they met. But the spark between them was undeniable. The moment they're eyes met in that dressing room, Carmen knew they had something she had never experienced before. But now standing there in the kitchen feeling like she had given it her all and wound up back at square one, she wasn't so sure of the connection anymore. "See...you don't even know what you want. If you can't talk to me and tell me something real and honest for once...then please just let me go. Then break this god damn chain you have on my heart and free me from this, because I can't take it anymore," her voice cracked on the last word and she felt the tears falling harder.

Shane didn't know what to do or say. That's a lie. She knew exactly what she wanted to do and say but the issue wasn't knowing. The issue was whether or not she had to guts to finally do it. _Do it...or you'll regret it. Don't let her slip through your hands again. _"I...want you here...with me." She loosened her grip on Carmen's arm and hoped that she wouldn't walk off.

The words hit Carmen hard. She felt Shane's hand loosen and she was debating whether or not to leave. But once again, she couldn't move. No matter how much she told herself that it wasn't worth her effort anymore, Shane had this hold on her that she couldn't shake. She didn't understand it; all she knew was she couldn't fight it. Despite everything in her telling her to leave, she turned around and her eyes met Shane's. She let out a gasp of air and it took her by surprise. It was unbelievable how those eyes affected her so much. She could stare into them forever. But she knew she had to be strong, so she looked away as quick as she could. "Why? Your still not telling me why you want me here Shane."

This was her moment, her chance to let Carmen know exactly how she felt. _Don't turn back now. _"You were right. There's something between us that I can't figure out. A connection that scares the shit out of me. Carmen, I'm terrified of feeling the way I do. All my life I've pushed people away because if I was scared of disappointing them, of letting them down so much that they end up leaving in the end. I figured it was easier to lose them before I started to really care about them. I'm good at it. I'm good at being alone. It's a pain that I'm use too. I built a wall around my heart and before you, no one's ever cared enough to try to break it down," she could feel her lip start to quiver with every sentence she spoke. But she was glad the words were finally coming out. "When we first met it was just about the sex. It wasn't suppose to mean anything to me. The more I saw you and the harder you tried to break me down, I knew this was going to be one of the hardest things I would have to do. I tried to shake it off and tell myself that it was just my mind playing tricks on me. I couldn't feel this way about someone again. Not after being hurt by Cherie. But then I saw you with Jenny and no matter how much work I put into getting you two together, it killed me. To see you kissing and fooling around, it kills me," it was at this point that she lost it. It had been a long time since Shane cried; it felt foreign to her.

Carmen could not believe what she was hearing. The words were coming so fast that it took her a bit to fully process them. Heart breaker Shane was bearing her soul to her. Carmen knew it was most likely the most difficult thing that Shane has ever done, and her hurt her to finally know why Shane tried so hard to be a loner. She'd never leave her. Shane could never disappoint her. It seemed almost impossible. Without even thinking, Carmen reached her hand up to Shane's face and wiped away her tears. She placed her hands on Shane's face and made her lock gazes. "Look at me Shane," Shane tried to move her face away. She was ashamed of her tears, ashamed that it had taken her this long to be honest. "Don't look away. Look at me." They're eyes met and there was silence for the longest time. It was as if neither of them wanted to break the silence that was enveloping them...like if one of them spoke the moment would be broken and revealed as a dream. "Jenny and I...its nothing compared to me and you. What we feel is new to the both of us. You don't think I'm fucking scared? Your reputation isn't a well kept secret. But I know you Shane. I know you put up this front but not to protect other people. You put it up to protect yourself. Its cowardly and its selfish, but its you. Its a part of you and I accept it. I care about you so much, you need to get that through your head. Let me help you. You don;t have to be alone...I can be with you. I want to be with you."

Time seemed to stand still. The words they both spoke hung in the air. Shane's thoughts were moving a mile a minute. She finally let her feelings out and she didn't regret it. She heard the words that she needed to hear, but could she let herself give in to Carmen? "I...can't, Carmen. I can't change the way I am. I..." Carmen cut her off before she could finish her thought. She placed her finger on Shane's lips. She let it linger on Shane's bottom lip briefly before she sensually caressed each velvety lip. It was at this moment that Shane knew she was a goner. Carmen had spoken of the hold Shane had on her heart, but Shane knew that Carmen had a hold too. Shane wrapped her arms around Carmen's waist and pulled her in closer than she already was. Carmen's arms instinctively wrapped around Shane's neck. They each moved in for a kiss but they had no idea what was in store for them. They lips met ever so softly. It was the most tender kiss they had ever experienced. One kiss quickly led to several fast and heated kisses. Their grips both got stronger and neither of them was letting go any time soon. Shane wanted to take Carmen into her bedroom and show her how badly she wanted her. But before getting caught up in the passion of the moment, Shane broke the kiss, "Okay...I can do this..." With those simple words...things would never be the same.


End file.
